Ready or Not, Baby Makes Three…

It’s that moment the doctor says “Ok mum, ready to meet your Daughter?” No word has ever had carried such weight before. Daughter… Mum… Ready?? What does being ready have to do with it??? Nine short months had come and gone and ready or not she was here.

My due date came and went and the nurses kept saying you will miss this quiet time where you can do what you want when you want. But I was so ready for this baby to arrive I was trying anything. In the last few days of my pregnancy you would have found me attempting interesting yoga positions, eating all the spicy food I could find, and trying an array of odd breathing techniques 3 days past her due date and she was here. I could hardly believe it. There was this beautiful baby girl it was as if I had known her all along and she had always been a part of me.

The drive home from the hospital with our new baby in our car was surreal! We of course had an influx of visitors for the first few weeks then came the day that everyone went home, and my husband went back to work and all of a sudden I as alone with this 6 week old baby. That morning I had my first mommy meltdown where it was just her and I. As she gooed and gawed in her crib I sat down next to her and I said “Ok take it easy on me as we are in this together and both learning our way here.” I know I’m probably not the first person to have a heartfelt conversation with a baby but I needed to tell someone that I didn’t know what I was doing. Then she looked my way and gave me this gummy smile and I knew we would be ok.

Three months into this new world of parenthood and every minute is so precious. Don’t get me wrong it doesn’t come without it’s own struggles, sleepless nights, self doubts and it’s unlimited unknowns. Constant thoughts of what cry was that: tired, hungry, diaper. Reading every book I could on how to get your baby on a schedule, sleeping right, growing properly. I was going cross eyed on conflicting strategies then I finally threw out the rule book “Who am I kidding she is a newborn; my newborn, my Maddy. We will figure out our own way.”

Maddy has just discovered her toes a whole new world of exploration is upon us. I sit back and watch in awe of how reaching for her toes and grasping her toys can bring on such belly rumbling laughter and limitless joy.

As adults our days get wrapped up in work life, daily errands and the nauseating drive home that we forget that life should be uncomplicated and exciting. We can learn a lot from babies. Only 3 months old and she’s teaching me new things every day. She may be the toughest boss I have ever had, screaming in my ear at least once a day, making me jump up as a moments notice to attend to her every need, making me work into the wee hours of the evening, but I wouldn’t change it for anything. I’m a mom, it’s what I do.

By Jessica Upton: I always knew I would be a mother and a wife one day. I was the kinda girl who looked down at my left hand saying “One day there will be a ring on there”; the kinda girl who used to look in the mirror saying “One day there will be a baby in there”. I just never thought I would meet my husband online and buy his mothers house embark on a massive 3 year renovation and get pregnant 2 months into starting a new job, a job I loved. Not knowing that this newest profession of becoming a parent was going to be my favorite job ever.

We now have our beautiful baby girl, Madison Emily Sutherland. And the three of us are about to embark on an incredible adventure together.That’s the thing about life; it doesn’t work off a script or follow anyone’s plans. Follow along as I take you through my year of maternity leave, it’s bound to be a rollercoaster. 

Mickey & Friends

Travelling with children can be exciting, challenging, and downright exhausting.  I won’t lie, I like a challenge, and my controlling nature makes sure every detail is covered. This often back fires and foils even my best laid out plans.

Three years ago, we packed up our truck, my two step daughters and niece, and hit the I-5, straight to see Mickey Mouse.  We programmed the GPS and the lovely lady inside told us we would arrive at our destination in 21 hours and 9 minutes.  Leaving from Vancouver, I thought to myself, we must be crazy to do this again.  I have got this I thought. I was a well oiled machine and I had each day planned.  I do this for two reasons; one is to maximize our time, and lastly, I am a vacation bargain hunter.  Yes, you heard me, a vacation bargain hunter. The deals are out there, you just need to know where to look.  There is a plethora of information available; you just need some time and Google! 

We had all our essentials packed and I even managed to bring my toaster with me for the mornings.  One would be impressed with the convenience store I was operating out of the back of our truck.  The kids had their own bags for the car and would refuel with snacks and drinks at each stop.  This was a huge lifesaver!  It saved us a bundle on convenience food and I managed to sneak in the odd piece of fruit. 

We love an adventure and it’s a great time as a family to really enjoy each other’s company.  Countless hours of rattling out random facts, playing I-spy (this never gets old, no matter the age) and bathroom breaks every 2 hours.  Books, iPods and car games – keep them busy during your travels.

We always book a room big enough to stretch out in, and a pool is a must!  It gives the kids a chance to blow off some steam and relax before bed.  It goes without saying, a full day, plus a swim before bed, equals a good night’s sleep for all. 

My one moment of absolute cleverness, was equipping each kid with a waist pack.  Each morning they loaded up on all their favorite treats from my little convenience store, which had now moved into our hotel room.  Brilliant idea!  I can’t even begin to tell you how much we saved on the candy and sweets we would have normally bought.  And each waist pack contained change for a pay phone, $5 and our phone numbers. 

We had an excellent time once again. And every other month, I get that hankering to do it all over again.

7 days of California sun, lots of laughs, and happy kids…it truly is the happiest place on earth.

Stay tuned for more adventures...Planes, trains and Toddlers!

Christi Manson is a married mother to a lovable 20 month old daughter and also rocks the part time position of Step Mama to two fabulous pre teen girls.

Is Your Mom Purse Bringing You Down?

The Dangers or Difficulties that Can Arise from One’s Handbag 

Bags.  As mommies we all have them.  Small, large, stylish or trendy.  Bags for fashion or bags for function.  Purses, diaper bags, travel bags or hand bags.  In fact, they practically become an appendage at some point.  But, are you aware of the impact they can have on your body?

Carrying a purse or bag on one side of your body creates a side bending pull, often lowering that side. The muscles on that side need to pull up to compensate for the downward pull. Your head also attempts to right itself by pulling in the opposite direction. This typically results in neck dysfunction. To avoid pain, be proactive by lightening the load of your bag, regularly switching shoulders or using a backpack.

Dawn Joseph is a certified personal trainer and owner of the Right Fit Fitness in Vancouver. She is a mom-on-the-run with a passion for working with people. Her newest launch is SUP Bootcamp Vancouver www.SUPBootcampVancouver.com

She can be reached at info@theRightFitFitness.com

Bye, Bye Binky

The "soother". In our house it goes by "soo", but is also commonly known as a "pacifier", "binky", "dummy", "sucky", "chewy". Whatever name you have for them and whether you use them or not, I believe a better, more universal word for these little plastic and silicone objects would be "miraculous".

Pacifiers have been around for hundreds of years with one of the first ones reported being an actual corn cob to soothe a baby in England in the 1680s. It then went on to be created out of all different types of materials that were full of lead and became a symbol of poorer classes in society. These days however, they seem to be a staple in most households. There are so many pros and cons and parents seem to be passionately either for or against them. We have two daughters and both of them had taken a soother early on in their life. Especially as a new parent I found that their use was a fantastic way to quickly stop unnecessary crying (when baby was neither hungry nor dirty) and help teach my babies to calm themselves and fall asleep. Over the past week however, the "soo" has had ME crying, unable to sleep and wanting to pull out my hair.

We have spent months with countless failed attempts at eliminating what we now refer to as our three-year old daughters "bad habit". We tried snipping the tips off, "losing them," giving them to a newborn, explaining that she is a big girl and asking her to throw them in the garbage. I am always so jealous of my friends that have kids who just one day were no longer interested, or got sick once and never asked for it again. Nothing would work for us and our youngest always seemed to have this magical stash of soothers throughout the house that she would dip in to when we made one disappear. After all this, we thought it was time to try going cold turkey and took a cue from super nanny and put in a call to the "soo fairy" and asked her to fly by for a visit. If you're not familiar with the technique, you explain to the child that the fairy is coming to visit and you coerce them into voluntarily leaving the thing they need to fall asleep in a special spot and they will wake up to a special toy in its place the next morning. While the idea is exciting and magical to any small child, the after math (for us anyway) is horrific. It really is like we've had to break a habit and she's detoxing, coming down off of her sleep drug, but we're doing it! Our family has had 4 (and counting) sleepless nights soother free. I am beginning to become hopeful that she won't be taking one to college with her.

I'd love to hear some opinions on soothers. Do you use them for your baby? Does anyone have proven successful tips to wean their child off?

By Jen Stewart mother of three, Bremmy, Vienna and Lincoln 10/2012 our angel
www.myhappilyeverafterstewartedition.wordpress.com

Thru the Looking Glass: a New Year, a Renewed Optimism

January Guest Blogger: Heather Hansen, mom of two

Things look different from a distance. Like my three year old son, the other day. I sat on my sister-in- law’s couch, tense and pulsing with irritation and frustration, my body processing the challenge that parenting him has been as of late, including that morning, and he was outside, on their 3rd floor apartment balcony.

Prior, he was restless and bored, also pulsating, I suppose, and had asked to go outside. In our life, most is made better by fresh air and I was relieved he was making a good choice, a seemingly infrequent event these days. My sister-in-law accompanied him and I remained inside, indulging in an opportunity to be child free while he was occupied in play and our baby slept.

As I sat facing the window while conversing however, there, over my brother-in-law’s broad shoulder, was my slight little soul, curiously exploring helicopter seeds, rushing about gathering them, and throwing them through the rails with glee. He looked so innocent, so delighted, so unrestrained, so carefree, and so familiar that I found my annoyance quickly evaporated, making room for an affectionate smile for the son he used to be and apparently, still was.

Being removed and being witness to his positive play begged the question: what and who is different, allowing room for him to behave this way?

It hurts to think that it might be my contribution to our dynamic, or his little brother’s, that is negatively spinning my son and resulting in a child I can’t always appreciate, or tolerate, even, but it’s likely true. It’s doubtful that he woke up that day, or the multiple days preceding the whimsical deck day and thought: now that I have a little brother, I’m going to be difficult. It’s much more plausible that when I move, he moves.

Perhaps he isn’t even ‘being’ challenging as so much as that I am challenged, and our life has been challenged, and he, like me, is trying to make sense of it all- but his high energy and low maturity are getting in his way.

I have to remember that just because he can put on his own shoes and zip up his own coat and brush his own teeth and spread his own peanut butter that he is still so little and that, inside his little self, his big sensitive heart is still playing the leading role. I have to look closely, at his eyes, in particular, and be in tune with his vulnerability and fear, and recognize when the contagion effect has rendered him shaken, in response to me having been.

It’s my job to be bigger than my fatigue and impulse, and my job to support him learn and stay confident as he experiments with boundaries, limits, and behaviour. It’s evident that with the company of an adult he trusts and who he can relax with, that his best is still possible.

This is what new years and resolutions are about. It’s about being fresh; it’s about being our best. And so, moving forward, I will take this perspective along: he, released and rosy-cheeked, and me, noticing.

Of all the goals I have for this upcoming year, none take precedent over re-establishing some harmony in our home and some grace in my parenting. I resolve to be someone he can be his best around. I will make the effort to be my best, by disciplining myself first.

Wish me luck. As always, my best wishes to you on your journey, as well. Happy New Year.

Heather  is a married mother of two and an allied health professional living in the greater Vancouver area. She is the author of motheryourbusiness.com and writes because words make her happy.